What is your area of expertise, who do you serve, and how do you serve them?

My area of expertise is infidelity prevention and building healthy relationships.

I’m going to use a quote (my own, which may seem slightly odd) from the back cover of my book, THE (IN)FIDELITY FACTOR: Points to Ponder Before You Cheat because it sums up who I serve:

“For those who have a desire to know and those in the throes of desire.”

My book promotes self-awareness, personal accountability, education, and growth. My overall approach is non-judgmental since I’ve also experienced infidelity. My ex-husband cheated on me, and I’ve been the other woman. Thankfully, I’ve learned a few things that I’m more than willing to share.

At the moment, I’m relaying the story of a man who’s experienced infidelity, discovery, and recovery. He chose to share his ongoing journey with me, which I pass on to the public per his permission.

His needs get served (he wants to deter others from infidelity), I get to share a heartfelt story, and the audience gains knowledge. It’s such a privilege to have someone trust you enough to recount the intimate details of their life for educational purposes. You can find Brett’s story on my website blog. Our collaboration has inspired me to seriously consider relationship coaching for men.
Side note: Men have been more open with me and their issues than women. I don’t know why that is, but I find it interesting.

Why would someone choose you over a competitor?

I have real-world experience on both sides of betrayal. I listen without judging yet stress salient points. I’m conversational, not clinical or holier-than-thou. I guide, then allow people to make their own choices. My book also offers up bits of humor to take the edge off, but the gist is firmly intact.

Share a specific time you encountered an obstacle and describe how you overcame it.

Honestly, I’ve been the obstacle at times.

There are a million infidelity stories. Infidelity is not a one-size-fits-all. I didn’t understand the depth of that at first. I’ve done a ton of research, listened to many narratives, and spoken to many professionals. Despite my non-judgy stance, I’ve had to expand and broaden my boundaries to accommodate the feedback. That was an eye-opening learning curve.

Share a short story about your best (or favorite) case study.

I have to refer to my ongoing Brett story on my website, which I previously mentioned. His story covers so many areas. He’s only one year into recovery and rebuilding his marriage, but he’s so aware.

I admire and applaud people who courageously take accountability for their actions and are actively trying to become healthier humans through trial and error yet consistently move forward and are dedicated to reaching new levels of growth.

What advice would you give the “20-Year-Old-You” who’s eager to start in life?

Know thyself and hone your instincts. Of course, at 20, no one is fully formed, but natural inclinations exist, and honoring them is vital.
I was sidetracked at times with the fun and games that come with being young. Although having adventures is essential, there are serious things to consider at the cusp of adulthood, such as finances and nurturing healthy relationships. Both are necessary elements to secure a fulfilled lifestyle. Even now, we need a more robust educational system when it comes to these subjects.
Overall, I could’ve gained through more interest, guidance, and knowledge instead of winging it. But figuring it out is also a part of the growth process.

Please describe a monumental time in your life that you’ll never forget.

Visiting Machu Picchu. It’s an amazing place. Such grandeur. Describing it won’t do it justice.

I love to travel. I’ve had many monumental times traveling, and now that COVID is somewhat under control, I’m looking forward to rebooting. There’s so much to explore!

List the direct links/URL to your social media profiles so people can follow you:

• https://twitter.com/eldamlopez
• https://www.facebook.com/TheInfidelityFactorPointsToPonderBeforeYouCheat
• https://www.instagram.com/elda.m.lopez